Pros and cons of popular parenting styles

In this special essay, Rebecca English, lecturer at the Queensland Institute of Technology (Australia), highlights the pros and cons of various parenting styles — tiger, helicopter, snowplough and free range What’s the best way to raise your child? It’s a question that has provoked the publication of numerous books, and seen authors race to coin the next quirky name for a new style of parenting. And it turns out there are many styles. To date, some of the best known are: Tiger parents, who are seen as pushing their children to succeed according to their parents’ terms. Helicopter parents, who take over every aspect of a child’s life. Snowplough parents, who remove obstacles to make life easier for their children. Free-range parents, who allow children a great deal of freedom. Attachment or gentle parents, relaxed but set limits in line with every child’s needs and character. Psychologists generally talk about parenting as fitting into typologies, based on the work of Diana Baumrind, a clinical and developmental psychologist known for her research on parenting styles. There are generally understood to be four typologies: Authoritarian. Parents who are the authority in their child’s life. They set the rules and say “jump” and their child responds “how high?”. (Very similar to tiger parents.) Permissive. They are lax about their expectations, don’t set standards and don’t ask much of their children. Neglectful. Uninterested in their children and unwilling to be an active part of their child’s life. Authoritative. They are highly demanding while being highly responsive. One of the major criticisms of these typologies is how culturally determined they are. So what does research say about the pros and cons of each of these parenting styles? Tiger parents Type of parent. You expect first-time obedience, excellence in every endeavour and a child who never talks back. Who coined it? Amy Chua popularised this name in her 2011 book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother. Chua describes tiger parents, often seen in Chinese families, as superior to Western parents. Chinese parents assume strength and don’t shy away from calling their children names. They assume their children owe them and expect their children to repay them by being obedient and making them proud. Why parents choose this style. Tiger mothers are, as Chua attests, socialised to be this way by their cultural conditioning. When they successfully demand an hour of piano practice, it’s part of their cultural background that the child complies. Western parents will have a hard time emulating the years of acculturation that leads to that moment. Parents who follow Chua may do so because they want their child to be successful. It may be these parents are deeply insecure about the future. These parents are most likely authoritarian. Pros. Raising a child in this way can lead to them being more productive, motivated and responsible. Cons. Children may struggle to function in daily life or in new settings, which may lead to depression, anxiety and poor social skills. But again it’s culturally dependent.…