I have two boys, aged seven and nine who are constantly bickering. I am aware that sibling rivalry is normal but it’s getting a bit too much. When will they grow out of it?
— Leela Mansi, Hyderabad
It’s common for siblings to fight and usually it’s more pronounced when both children are boys or girls. Avoid getting involved in their quarrels. Instead set boundaries and conditions — no abuse or badmouthing each other and proscribe all physical violence. Encourage them to develop negotiation and peace-making skills bilaterally. As they grow, they will learn to settle their disagreements amicably.
My daughter used to enjoy school. Now she finds it tiresome. Some of her friends are homeschooling and she wants to do likewise. Homeschooling is impractical for me because I am a full-time working mom. How do I motivate her to appreciate her school?
— Sheetal Madhu, Mumbai
During the past two years of the Covid pandemic when schools were closed, children have become accustomed to learning online from home. But homeschooling is very different from online classes conducted by school teachers. The homeschooling system in India is not very well-developed and not on a par with Western countries. It’s natural for children to entertain apprehensions about returning to full-time in-person school after two years of learning from home. Give her time to adjust to the school routine. As a parent, you know what’s best for your child, so make the decision without any guilt.
My son loves science but hates history. He says studying history isn’t going to help him in the future. How do I explain to him that he needs to study all subjects?
— Roma Sharma, Delhi
Today’s children have a greater clarity about what they want to study in higher education than we did. However, it’s important to make him understand that having a good grounding in all subjects — including history and the humanities — is critical to acquiring holistic education. It doesn’t matter whether he will pursue another stream in college. Insist that he must invest his best effort to study all subjects at the school level.
My seven-year-old daughter is often depressed because her friends tease her for being a little overweight. She has begun eating less at meal times. I have counselled her but still she doesn’t seem happy about it.
— Mishka Singh, Bengaluru
Bullying is an unfortunate reality in schools. Children are teased and taunted about their weight, height, for wearing braces, spectacles, dark complexion, bad accents, etc.
As parents, our responsibility is to help children develop a positive body image and social confidence. Encourage her to exercise, eat healthy and enrol in sports and co-curricular activities. Simultaneously, you could consult a paediatrician or endocrinologist to examine if she is predisposed to obesity.
(Dr. Pallavi Rao Chaturvedi is a parenting coach, founder – Get Set Parent, and vice-president, Early Childhood Association of India)
