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Helping children cope in new environments

PW invited parents of JBCN International School, Oshiwara, Mumbai to share insights on how they help children feel confident in a new setting

Born in 2020 when the global pandemic hit India, my daughter Sophia (pre nursery) barely interacted with the outside world until she was two years old. Over time, she started meeting new people and making new friends. I follow a parenting style that gives my daughter the liberty to make her own choices. I believe making small decisions has boosted her confidence to such a level that she can comfortably say “No”. I respect her decision when she says “No I don’t want to hug” or “Let’s go home”. Being able to freely express her discomfort has made Sophia more confident about making choices. This confidence has helped her adjust to new settings knowing she has a choice to express herself if she feels uncomfortable.

-Pooja Shukla, entrepreneur

I believe the passport to a lifetime of mental and social well-being of my twins — Neevan and Katya (class VIII) — is self-esteem. As parents, it is our duty to ensure their self-esteem is intact. Driven by the adage ‘confident parents raise confident children’, we always encourage our twins to make their own decisions and assure them that we will guide and support them even when they fail or make mistakes. Moreover, we encourage them to meet new people, make new friends, and participate in several activities so they don’t feel out of place. It’s common for children to experience anxiety, fear, and insecurity in new settings especially new school, home, hostel or city. Therefore, I keep the flow of conversation and reassurance going.

— Gauri Pradhan Tejwani, actor and entrepreneur (Knotty Tales), Mumbai

Since her childhood, we have always given Kuhu (class X) the freedom of choice while reassuring her that her family fully supports her. And this has worked for her. When we enrolled her in class VI of a residential school for the first time, she took time to settle in. We constantly reassured her that she had the capability to live away from home. This made Kuhu believe in herself and gave her that much-needed confidence to settle in happily. When her school suddenly shut down and she was forced to switch schools in class X, like any normal teenager she was anxious. But our support and encouragement helped restore her confidence to settle in comfortably in her new school environment.

— Sancheeta Bose, writer, Mumbai

For our children — Jehan (class X) and Zubin (class VIII) — Kuwait had always been home while India was merely a destination for annual vacations. But things changed with the global pandemic compelling us to relocate to Mumbai. In making this decision, we were aware of the impact it would have on the children. Therefore, we decided to involve them in all discussions, encouraging them to express their fears, lending a willing ear and respecting their opinions. This included the critical decision of their schooling. Once the children were admitted into their new school (JBCN International, Oshiwara), we continued to provide reassurance of our understanding and let them evolve at their pace. We believe this has given them the confidence to deal with their new school environment.

— Anaahita Khareghat, educator, Oberoi International School, Mumbai

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